Sunday, January 07, 2007
8:06 AM

i am in such a crappy crappy mood, it's so not funny.. i'll be back in perth in 10 days.. i mean, God knows i cant wait to see my friends, but when i think about all the other problems waiting to engulf me the minute i touch down, i panic and then think to myself, maybe going back isnt really such a good thing after all.. initially, when i still had 3 more weeks here, i was estactic about going back.. but now thinking about going back i can say im estactic, jaffa's way when he said it in Aladdin.. "estactic..." *blank, bored expression*..
gah, it's all such a huge confusion, i'm scared, i'm afraid, i'm confused, i'm worried.. and did i say i'm scared?!
i know i cant run away from it all, and i know i cant avoid it forever.. but being here for 6 weeks has been an absolute bliss, boring kind of a bliss, but bliss nontheless.. here i dont have anything to worry about, i can ignore all else, and i can pass my days by "living" someone elses life somehwere in hogwarts, london, ireland and america.. authors sure have a fantastic way of transporting the reader through leagues of unknown territory, bring them into a world they supposedly know, ignite their imagination, help them escape reality for awhile and put them through an adventure, where they feel for the character/s involved and the situations they get themselves into, without actually experiencing it themselves.. however, it all just seems so real sometimes, well actually i wish it were all so real sometimes..
i wish i was still a kid when the only thing i'd have to worry about was getting my homework done.. and that's it.. oh and of course the report card at the end of every semester.. ok now that was always a scary experience, i was never good in school you see... the class that i was in.. was well, kinda frowned upon by all these you-can-only-make-it-in-life-if-you-study-science- kind of teachers... all these crap teachers coming to my class telling us we'd not make it far in life cos we're studying art and home econs.. i mean so what if we're good at cooking or at art? so what if science and maths doesnt interest us? i hate the way singaporeans can be so narrow minded sometimes.. with this ridiculous believe that science is the ONLY way to go.. if people would give the arts a chance, they would see it's immense value and learn to not just appreiciate it but know that it is in many ways harder than science.. i mean think about it, for science, maths, history, geography, languages.. there is 99.9% of the time a yes or no answer, it's either one or the other... whereas for arts, there just isnt... oh gosh, all these horrid horrid people that look down on people with a degree in bachelor of the arts.. i feel like whacking them.. and yes i can be violent.. in fact, some people say im so violent they mistake as a guy... well, thanks... i guess?

i told my dad that i'm gonna grow old, get a one room apartment, buy a cat every year for 27 years, so i can grow old with 27 cats, i already have names for a few of them... i shall name one ditzy (for frances), blurry (for sheryl), edd (for jason), vesty (for amos), co co pop head (for paul), shrieky (for joey), libby (for lip eng), zany ( for emily), .... i'll think up for more when im a little bit more creative (which i'm not) and a little less depressed ( which i am).. and im not talking bout slit my wrist i wanna die kind of depression... more of a....SUPER SIAN kind of depression.... oh and guess what my dad said when i told him bout my 27 cats investment.. he said, after 5 minutes of tense silence.."why dont you rear some fish..?".....
yeah i couldnt say anything to that, i was flabbergusted... ok so im not the kind of girl that says.."oh im so fat" and expect the person i'm saying it to.. to say: "oh no you're not love, you're as slim as a toothpick..." nah, ok when i say i'm smthg, im that..... but the last my dad couldve said was..." nah dont worry, you'll get married my little princess..." but nah.. he asks me to rear some fishes...- _ - and look at that, i'm on to using cheesy facial symbols to illustrate my emotions... how depressing...

i reckon i've become rather cynical... maybe im reading too much.. i think a headless bird is adorable, and im talking about depression.... i am in need of a rainbow, some sunshine, a field of flowers, and well every other happy things that people associate with...... cheerfulness.

so now let's have a random switch of topics now shall we?
i was watching wwe the other day..and they had a wwe tribute to the troops..so they went down to iraq and had matchess right in the middle of the army camp. i'm such a cry baby, cos it moved me to tears... oh gosh. see told you im cynical... watching wwe makes me tear.. what is the matter with me!? i'm weird. so anyways, back to wwe...my mom, sis and i went to watch it when they came to singapore ages ago.. but it was sooo wiicked.. it was bloody amazing. we were 5 rows from the ring side, and it was freaking awesome. we jumped on the chairs, yelled out, cheered, booed.. and when shawn michael came out, my sis and i went ballistic.. yelling like crazy teenage girls... haha. and when we saw owen hart (who has already passed on due to a very unfortunate circumstance), we booed him and said we would rather have his brother bret hart... and when big bam bigalo asked who wanted to go wrestle with him..my mom leaped onto her chair and shouted..."ME!!!! " but anyways, since most of the oldies are gonee, i like the hardy brothers cos they're super cool and the way they fight is well, super cool as well... and i like the generation x, triple H and shawn michaels....

anyways, a couple of new things to add to my wishlist.....
1) i wish i could play the drums...
2) i wish i had a pen pal, i used to write countless letters... like COUNTLESS..and i still have all the letters that people used to write to me...=)
3) i wish i had wrestling boots, like the ones that jeff hardy wears...
4) i wish i had all the books in the world.. ok no scrap that, i wish i had all the books i wanted to read..

ok so that's more than a couple... but who's keeeping count!?

alrights then, that's enough for today i think i've bored enough people, and perhaps maybe spread the joy of the life that is mine...yippee *jumps for joy ESTATICALLY* (if there even is such a word.... )

♥;